I don't like being the bad guy.

When i found out i was having a child my mind was filled with all the amazing journeys i was about to embark on. How my adventure in life was going to become even more exciting and all the fun we were going to have. 

I did not imagine being the bad guy. 

I hate being the bad guy. 

What is the bad guy? The bad guy is the person that says no you can't have another biscuit, and say no to getting more toys out just before bed time. 

I don't like being that guy. I don't like making my child cry. 

I honestly did not contemplate this part of parenthood. 

I was merrily going along with a baby who doesn't have any strong preferences or the ability to shout " no no no" at the top of their voice. And then one morning BAMN!!! i had a toddler.  A toddler with strong preferences, who has a personality, who has a point of view. 

I don't want to set ground rules and say no to things that are probably quite fun. When all is said and done i want to make my son happy all the time. 

But i can't. I've got to set ground rules, I've got to teach him right from wrong so he grows up to be a respectable young man. I'm his mom, it's in my job description.

I just hope all the "yes's" out-weigh the "no's" and they are just a fading thought. 

Anyone else had being the bad guy?

Little Owl Farm Park

Today Oliver and I visited Little Owl Farm Park in Worcestershire, with my friend and her little girl.

This is a fairly new attraction which I believe has only opened in the last 12 months. I had previously looked on line about going but the price didn't really seem to match up to the amount of animals on offer. But after our visit, I am pleasantly surprised.

Little Owls is a traditional farm park, there is opportunity to bottle feed the pigs and  deer. There is a petting barn, where you can hold chicks and rabbits. This, I was really impressed with, as on previous visits to petting barns, you're given the chick to hold, whilst trying to juggle a toddler. But here they pop them in a little plastic tray (sounds cruel, but rest assured it isn't), so you can pop the tray on your lap and not have to worry about run away animals/children.

There are meerkats, a bit out of place but a great attraction never the less and lots of ducks and chickens.  It doesn't sound like much but there are a lot of opportunities for the kids to interact with the animals and the staff are so friendly and willing to tell you more about the animals or let you hold them.

Along side the animals there is lots of play opportunities. 

First of all, most parents worst nightmare- soft play! It's small, but it's clean and does the job. It's great if its a slightly rainy day and want to seek some shelter or like we did and the kids just wanted to run wild for 5!

They then have a barn filled with ride on tractors. There are two sections, under 5's and then 5-11. The under 5's section have push along tractors as Oliver is modelling below. Then the 5-11's have pedal tractors. Again fab if its a bit rainy. 

And finally, the piece de resistance: a massive sandpit with two humongous inflatable pillows for bouncing. I cannot highlight how utterly fantastic this was. The kids absolutely loved it, even if Oliver decided to start his career as a stunt man by throwing himself down it (heart in mouth). 

As I said before I thought it was going to be overpriced for what it was, but at £24 for a family ticket (£20 in the week out of school holidays) I actually think its pretty well priced.

We visited on the first day back at school for most children, so it was really quiet. I can imagine at the height of summer or at the weekend it would be rather chaotic and maybe not as enjoyable with smaller children. But I would most definitely recommend a visit.

If you want to find out more visit: www.littleowlfarmpark.co.uk

Friends after children!

OK so once you've picked yourself up off the floor from laughing at the prospect of having a social life after children there is a few things I have learnt. 

 Ollie is now 17 months old, i like to think i am a good mom but my social life and friends seemed to have suffered. 

 When you have children, replying to a text or commenting on something funny on Facebook kind of goes out the window, you don't have time to browse. 

You can't drop everything at the drop of a hat to go for drinks, go dancing or on a shopping trip. 

Some friends get this. 

You have some that also have children, and appreciate that three line text they got last month. That’s enough to stay connected. 

Others will just understand children are hectic; she'll get back to me when she can, and they won't take it to heart.

Then there are the friends that just don't get it!! To quote one of my oldest friends. 

"Nothing will change when the baby comes, s/he will just have to work around you"

Needless to say i haven’t seen them much in the past 18 months. 

Don't despair if your friends are more like the latter. 

Your social groups will change. 

Personally I've found friendship in baby groups and through talking to other moms on twitter. 

That trendy bar you used to hang out in will become the local park or a local baby group. 

You'll find you BFF will probably become the mother/father of the child your little one gets on with the most. 

That's ok, they are on your wave length, they understand the struggles motherhood brings. 

And to the ones that don't understand, just be there, silently waiting, for the moment they have children.....

Then they will understand and you may be the one friend they have who is there with them.

Handmade flower pressed phone covers

I have just taken delivery of the most beautiful phone cover I have ever seen. 

Since having my iphone I haven't been a big fan of the covers available as I find them boring or tacky, but desperately needed one due to my toddlers ever growing obsession with my phone. So when I came across Handmade flower press phone covers I was really excited 

They are a new venture based in Hereford. Chloe, a mum herself, starting making phone covers after she faced the same condundrum I did. A graduate of photography, her creativity really shines through. 

The phone cases themselves are faultless. They encompass beautifully pressed fresh flowers and against the colours of the iPhone 5c look beautiful. 

They are finished to a very high standard and look very professional.

I paid £8 + £1 postage for my iPhone 5c cover. 

To find out more visit: Flowerphonecases.com or https://m.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1505880999624303

And spread the word!

End of an era, start of a new one.

 
As brummymumoftwo  has said before some posts are written for reaction, some sharing advice or reviews but some, like this one you just want to write and get out there just to help you.

Today is my last day in my current job. I am leaving to follow my ambition of being a teacher. Scared- yes, excited – very!

I was due to start training September 2013 but due to my ill health after having Oliver and just not feeling emotionally ready, I deferred for a year.  Oliver has been attending a child minder 3 days a week since January now, but from September he will be going full time. I am riddled with guilt!!

Currently we get two days together (aside from the weekend) where we can do mommy and son things. I feel as if I am letting him down by sending him to a child minder full time. I know hundreds of thousands of mothers go back to work full time and send their children to childcare, and this is by no means me saying they are wrong, needs must at the end of the day, but for some reason it is sat at the back of my mind.

I also feel slightly selfish returning to education but know I am doing it for the right reason. Secure future for my family, happier mummy enjoying her job and also in the long run I think I will spend more time with Oliver.

I am sure he will love playing with children all day, and not be stuck with his mum all the time. I’m also sure the time apart will do us the world of good, absence makes the heart grow fonder.

I just hope I am making the right decision for my whole family and everything works out.

So watch this space, and if anyone sees me losing the plot slightly just give me a virtual slap!!

Debenhams Back to School competition: Oliver's entry.

 

This is an entry into The Debenhams Back to School Competition on www.brummymummyof2.co.uk

Right, so Oliver is only 18months old so this was always going to be fun. I decided to get up the Debenhams website on the laptop and he could point to which ones he liked. We could have ended up with something quite flamboyant but I think in the end we did quite well.

So first pick was Designer blue belted chinos by J by Jasper Conran. 

Next up was gingham polo again by J by Jasper Conran. 

The shoes picked were Bluezoo two tab trainers. 

Then finally for when winter sets in a navy duffle coat. Once again from J by Jasper Conran( I think he likes this range) 

Looking forward to having a browse at some of the other entries. 

Ten top tips for holidaying with toddlers.

We recently had a UK break. Here are some tips that may help if you are going on one.  

1. There is no such thing as too many toys. Don't think you'll be too busy to play with that toy or they won't want that one. They will, just take it, save tantrum time now. 

2. Don't rush. Just like everyday toddlers, holiday toddlers do not like to be rushed. Yes, they need to inspect EVERYTHING new you walk past and yes there will be tantrums if you rush them. 

3. Swimming. Many parents are not a fan of taking small people swimming. It's raining, they are climbing the walls. Embrace the swimming, ignore the 300 other chimdren in the pool. Swimming is your friend. 

4. Beach. Beaches are fab. If the weather suits, it's lots of open space for running and playing. They don't cost anything which is a massive bonus. 

5. Have rainy day activities planned just incase. You can rely on the uk weather. 

6. Grandparents. We were fortunate (?) to go with my in laws. Take advantage of them. They love spending time with their grandchildren. Sit back, put your feet up and have a glass of pimms. 

7. Car= sleep. Not always. He'll sleep in the car. Yeah, totally didn't. All the way to Somerset. Be prepared for that. Don't assume. 

8. Don't stop. We thought we'd have a leisurely drive down. Stop and have breaks. Don't just don't. Getting him back in the cat seat sounded like he was in serious pain. It really wasn't worth it. 

9. Bed time. Routine I hear you cry. Yeah that just flew out the window. Don't force it. Go with the flow. They've got to sleep eventually. 

10. Relax and enjoy. Don't get stressed just go with it and remember it's your holiday too! 

Contray to what this may portray we had a really good time, UK holidays are very must underrated. 

Wicked Wednesday.

Nice family holiday selfie. 

Wicked Wednesdays

Such beautiful creatures 

There's no such thing as a Gruffalo.

This year marks the 15th anniversary of The Gruffalo. So to celebrate the forestry commission is hosting the Gruffalo Trail. 

Up and down the country different venues are playing host to the gurffalo. There is a signposted trail around the forest, with well know gruffalo characters on the way to finding the gruffalo. 

So we decided to go along to the one at the Wyre Forest in Kidderminster. 

You have the opportunity to buy a trail pack for £2. This includes a sticker, a colouring sheet and an activity sheet. 

You don't need this to do the trail but it's a nice added touch for older children. 

So off we went. 

There a signs like the one above all the way round. They all have activities on them to engage children with the forest and the story.  

You also have signs like the one below to show you where to go, so don't worry about getting lost!! 

The aim is to find all the characters from the book. Like the ones below. 

We also found some wigwams along the way which my lad loved. 

And then eventually you will find the Gruffalo!! 

It was a lovely day out. We took a picnic with us and made an afternoon of if. I imagine older children will engage more with the activities. Where as my boy just enjoyed running around the forest and finding the animals. 

To find your nearest trail visit: http://www.forestry.gov.uk/gruffalo

Toddler tantrums.

Last week I was shopping with my little one and he decided to have the mother of all tantrums because I dared to ask him to hold my hand and not to run off- I know, right, evil mother, what was I thinking.
It was a gale force 10. We had shouting, screaming, crying and then finally sitting on the floor and refusing to move.
The feeling of eyes glaring at me accompanied with various sounds of tutting, I wanted the ground to swallow me up, I was horrified. But then it occurred to me my child is just trying to express himself in the only way he currently knows.
 Young child have trouble expressing themselves. Imagine if you couldn’t explain to someone how you were feeling, or what you wanted. You would probably end up having a tantrum.  
The fact that then other people around, in this case other parents or expectant parents, (I was in Kiddicare) feel the need to judge is just unnecessary and they really have no right.  As parents we need support, you know the look some parents give you, the “I’ve been there look.” Not to feel like we are raising a monster or are socially inept.
My little one is getting better with his words (only 18 months old so not expecting miracles) and one day he will be able to express himself without screaming and shouting , but until then I just hope people will be more understanding when a child is having a meltdown, it is just part of growing up. 

Have you ever had a similar experience?
Toddler had a meltdown in middle of a public place? 

An open letter

Dear readers,

Recently a lot of bloggers have been on the receiving end of nasty and vindictive comments regarding their recent posts.

It’s really really unkind and unnecessary.

When reading our blogs there are a few pointers that may help you to stop being so nasty:

1. 9/10 we are not being serious.

2.Many of the things we say (moan about) are highlighting day to day occurrences of raising children etc, they are meant to be funny.

3.If you think we are being nasty, don’t be a troll and leave a horrid comment. Just keep to yourself or tell a friend. We don’t write to provoke; we write to entertain, inform and for enjoyment. Don’t take that away from us.

4. Just in case you haven’t fully understood points 1-3 :  WE ARE TRYING TO FUNNY/IRONIC.

5. And lastly, no one is forcing you to read these posts. If you don’t like it don’t read it. And if all else fails and you want to be a troll go and join the fellow trolls on the Daily Mail website.

Thanks in advance

x

He is just a normal boy, right?

My boy is coming up to 18 months now and is really coming into his own. When I say coming into his own he is becoming a "proper" little boy.

I seem to spend my time apologising when he runs at full pace through the park, whilst chasing a squirrel or goes head first down the slide at Gymboree.

Climbing up the slide, who needs stairs?' 

But when I sat down and thought about it, I realized he is just a boy, a very boisterous boy, but nevertheless, a boy.

I’m hoping as he grows up and understands more, I can teach him to be calm and to sit still ( haha I know, pipe dream). But for now I think I will just let him be, let him explore the world at 100mph and just feel proud that he wants to explore the world and learn more and hope we don't end up in A&E!! 

Strep A awareness

II'm running the Birmingham half marathon in October to raise money for Birmingham Women's Hospital. 

Why? I was very ill after having my son and spent three weeks there on the high decency unit. 

I has a rare form of Strep A. Below is my story. 

If you'd like to sponsor me please visit: 

http://www.justgiving.com/Laura-Bowker

 What is Strep A?

Streptococcus is an infection caused by bacteria, is can range from a throat infection to pneumonia. They then fall into two groups, A & B.

Strep A often found on the surface of the skin and inside the throat and a common cause of infection in adults and children.

After having my son in 2013 I had Strep A. It started when I was on the post natal ward when my feet continued to swell, I was told this was completely normal so ignored it. After a couple of days of being at home I had developed flu like symptoms which my GP provided me antibiotics for. But then a red/purple rash began to appear on my feet and legs. My GP didn't have a clue what was wrong with me and actually said " I don't really know what is wrong, call me tomorrow if you are no better".

My parents then rushed me back in to the womens hospital as they were so worried and they were right to be. The doctors checked my infection level and were shocked with the results, normal range in about 1-15 and mine had hit 600! My body had start to shut down and major organs were starting to fail, my body was going into septic shock.

I won't go into all the details but I ended up spending 3 weeks in intensive care. I missed the first 3 weeks of my sons life, time I will never see again.

I had countless tests and scans and it took doctors about 10 days until they narrowed it down to Strep A. The  infection had settled itself in my womb and the only way to treat it was a full hysterectomy at 23. I was devastated at the time, although now I find myself fortunate as the surgeon only had to remove one ovary in the end.

This could all have been avoided if my GP had noticed my symptoms, but the infection is so rare and so not many health professionals know much about it.

If you'd like to find out more visit http://www.sepsistrust.org

Gymboree

Gymboree Play & Music offer music and sensory classes for babies and pre-school toddlers in the UK. Classes involve parent or carer teaching with fun and interesting activities.

Boy and I have been going to Gymboree since he was 4 months old. We started off in the baby sensory class. Going to be honest, when we started he didn't seem that engaged or bothered, don't know what I was expecting from a 4 month old!! But as time went on he became more and more interested. The classes are a mix of songs, movement, singing, puppets, fibre optics and musical instruments.


Each session is themed, the beach, trains or Christmas (see below)

Each class starts off with mat time. Each child has there own mat with a couple of pieces of equipment such as pom pom, scarves, rain maker, tambourine, maraca or fibre optic glow stick. Babies are encouraged to have tummy time on mirrors which is fab as they are not just staring at the floor, it also a great social activity as all the babies are facing each other and interacting.

The rest of the class is smaller activities that children can visit such as balls, music mat, or light tent. All with the aim to engage babies.

Just after Christmas, once my boy starting "walking", we moved up to the next class. This was a huge jump as its more apparatus based but now he is settled he loves it. We still have group activity at the beginning, but this is more rhymes with the aim to help learning, for instance my head, my shoulders, my knees, my toes.

Then we move onto the chance for the children to explore the activities and start to climb or go through tunnel or post shapes. The activities are left very open and give children the chance to move at their own pace and make of it what they will.

All sessions finish with bubbles, something my boy loves (it was one of his first words!!). Then there is the goodbye song, which is catered for the age group and there is actions for the children to follow 

With your membership you are able to access their open gym sessions, which run normally once or twice a day. These are totally unstructured and just a chance to use the facilities.

The theme running through the whole thing is Gymbo, he is a colourful clown who demonstrates the activities with the session leader. Boy LOVES Gymbo, and his face lights up when he sees him.

I can't recommend this enough, my boy seems to have come on leaps and bounds in his development and personally I think this is because of going to Gymboree. If you want to find out more visit: http://gymboree-uk.com/

Cbeebies Land - My Review

James and I were so overly excited when we heard this was opening, my boy loves cbeebies and although he doesn’t watch much TV Mr Tumble has become some kind of toddler god in our house!

So from the moment we heard about it we decided we would take him. Now I was not overly keen on forking out over £70 for one part of a huge theme park so I decided to collect the sun tokens way back in March/April time. We were lucky enough to get two adult tickets and as my boy in under 4 he got free entry.

If I’m honest I thought we would be there about an hour, hour and half tops as he would be far too young for it. As it happens we were there all day and I was really pleasantly surprised. 

The weather was not on our side when we got there and being a novice mom and I was not fully prepared (no wellies, no rain coat for dad) but it soon brightened up to a beautiful day.

We started off with the Postman Pat ride. As we went on a wet Monday in June, it wasn’t too busy and we only had to queue for about 30 mins. It was a great ride. Loads of interatcition opportunities. As you drove past various stops with well-known characters, you could deliver whatever is was they were missing. OQ was a bit young for this but he enjoyed pressing the buttons and beeping the horn!

Next was the Numtums ride, which was essentially a merry go round. Didn’t have to queue for more than about 10 mins and my boy loved it. Only criticism was that the music stopped way before the ride ended, so the novelty kind of wore off pretty quickly after that!

 

Please excuse my hair, I was soaked!

 

Charlie and Lola house was fab. It was more of a play area than a ride but it gave boy chance to run around safely (and out of the rain).

Mr Bloom was up next. This was more of a show than a ride. Tiddlers had the chance to explore the garden to find food to feed Compo which gave a great interaction and learning side to it. Once they had fed Compo we went inside to meet the Veggies. The cast of this were great, they interacted with the children so well and kept there ( and mine) attention really well.

In the Night Garden was the best of the day. They had just introduced a timed ticket system for this, and after hearing stories of 90 minute queues I was really pleased about this. We still had to queue, but only for 10 mins or so. Really good thinking from Alton Towers, saving lots of screaming toddlers.  You go on a little boat ride around the night garden and visit all the characters. My boys face lit up and he loved waving to all the characters. I imagine if I had queued for over an hour like a lot of parents had previously I wouldn’t have been as impressed but the ticket system makes it worthwhile.

 

 

Mr Tumbles Garden was also brilliant. Lots of plants and flowers to touch and smell and spotty bags to look inside. Boy loved this ( mainly because he could wave and dance with Mr Tumble, see video).

 I would highly recommend this to any family with children 1+  Such a good family day out. There are lots of interactive aspects to give children the chance to learn and explore.  Although I think out of everything my boy enjoyed the monorail ride over to the park the most!!!!

Few other things to note:

Queuing entertainment:  In all the queues they have small games etc to keep the children entertained. Such a good idea but I though there could be a few more.

 

 

Buggy parks:  Throughout the land there are places to leave your buggy. Now I was really nervous about this as they are not secure. However it works really well. Don’t think you won’t need your buggy…you will!!!! Just take it!

Picnic:  As you can imagine the food there is horrendously overpriced. So take picnic with you. If it is a nice day there loads of places inside and outside the land to eat and even if it is a bit rainy there are paces to stop an eat inside.

Weekend/holidays: I don’t want to put any one off now but I can imagine that at the weekend or during the holidays it would be bedlam and the queues would be unbearable with small children. So take things to keep them entertained whilst waiting (smarties, iphone games, anything!!!)

Height restrictions:  Just note there are height restrictions on a couple of rides ( Justin’s house and Tree fu Tom)

Admission:  There is no getting away from the fact it is a lot of money to get it. I’d recommend finding a 241 voucher. I really hope Alton Towers introduce a way of just having admission for Cebeebies land, I think they would attract more return visits that way!